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 For all the Mom's and Mom's-to-be

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Lightfoot
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Number of posts : 451
Age : 57
Location : is everything
Registration date : 2008-04-23

PostSubject: For all the Mom's and Mom's-to-be   Fri Jul 25, 2008 1:57 pm

> JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister.
> After a while he asked: ' Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one
> for cold milk?'
>
> MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so
> old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, 'If you don't remember you
> must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six.'
>
> STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom good night. 'I love you so much
> that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window.'
>
> BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain
> to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it
> was a child-proof cap and she'd have to open it for her.
> Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: 'How does it know it's me?'
>
> SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. 'Please don't
> give me this juice again,' she said, 'It makes my teeth cough.'
>
> DJ (age 4 ) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: 'How much do I cost?'
>
> MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and kissing
> in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: 'Why is
> he whispering in her mouth?'
>
> CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked what
> was troubling him, he replied, 'I don't know what'll happen with this bed
> when I get married. How will my wife fit in?'
>
> JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: 'The man named
> Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked
> back and was turned to salt.' Concerned, James asked: 'What happened to the
> flea?'
>
> >TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
> >wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a while and then
> asked, 'Why doesn't your skin fit your face?'
>
> The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget..... this particular Sunday
> sermon...'Dear Lord,' the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven
> and a rapturous look on his upturned face. 'Without you, we are but dust.
> ..' He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter who
> was listening leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little
> four year old girl voice, ' Mom , what is butt dust?'

_________________
"Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders & says...'Oh shit....she's awake!!"
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